JUDGMENT

I had a powerful session with my coach this week. We were mainly going through a strategy for my business' growth. It was very exciting setting a clear pathway for how Serenwood is going to grow both organically & through intentional marketing in the coming months. And thinking about what will become possible for me in terms of creating impact in the world - and the issues I care about - as that growth generates momentum.

Unbidden, a fear came up for me around that success. And it was the fear of being judged. When we stay "ordinary" and under the radar, no-one really thinks or talks about us too much. We can quietly hide.

When we become extraordinary or do something note-worthy we instantly attract attention. Good attention, and bad attention.

There is often talk in the online world about "haters" - trolls or people who turn up to abuse or challenge people who are showing up and attracting attention. A really interesting perspective on that is that if you have no "haters" you aren't doing anything extraordinary. Have you heard business coach Becky Tsaros Dickson talk about this? (If not - or you don't know Becky yet, go join The Entreprenuer Incubator FB group and look out for her livestreams!)

When you show up, you have to expect polarisation. Some people will love what you do, some people will intensely dislike what you do. That polarisation is a good thing - because it means you are creating impact.

My coach said to me these words "People are going to judge you anyway. Whether you do or you don't, that's just part of life. What if you just accepted that, and did what you wanted anyway?"

This is tough for me. I've always been a people pleaser. I dislike confrontation. I'm a mediator and I shy away from extremism. I look for external validation a lot. I'm not unusual in this - many women are the same.

And for us women, that fear of being judged is very present in our lives. It stops us in our tracks. It forces us to conform. It makes us hide our light & dull our talents and live a quiet life.

So how about we just accept that judgment exists, and step up and create the life we want regardless. What about if we embraced "haters" and were ready to celebrate polarisation as a sign of our own success.

How much happier would that make us? How much more impact are we going to have? How many more people are we going to help?

My goal this week: find some people who dislike what I'm doing. Because then I'll know that I'm succeeding.